The Unknown
Tonight a girlfriend said something to me that resonated deep within me. She said "I'd rather experience the unknown than stay in unhappiness." I share similar beliefs...However, sometimes life encourages you to stay in something (be it at job, a relationship, friendships, et al) as a way to love, learn more or bring you a new perspective on an old lesson. And yet sometimes you even encourage yourself to stay in a situation in fear of losing control or giving up an investment. There's a lot of sometimes. Luckily, all situations are particularly unique and personal...but what remains is the choice.
Dictate your own life because you only have one. I've always been attracted and an advocate of the unknown primarily because it was my thrill and adventure. Thus far, I've not jumped out of an airplane because I was thrust already into the deep end of the pool. As years go by, the word "attachment" to various commitments and goals have lingered over my head as "responsibility" and "freedom" seem to teeter on both sides of the see-saw.
Yet what is audible to your adult heart is the same sound you heard as a child.
I like the unknown. And if you're truly unhappy and unsatisfied, I encourage you to take "the path less traveled by" like my dear poet Robert Frost advised.
It may not be popular. It may be judged as selfish. It may be labeled like "divorce, loser, flake." So be it. It's just conventional rules. Rules set forth by a generation, a society, your upbringing. But rules nonetheless. It's no one's fault. Only yours if you stay in dissastisfaction. That's not to be said there will never be compromise, but leap if you dare to conquer your dreams.
And when you are leaving that job, that lover, that life...I pray for you to have someone that also honors not only you but the unknown too. Because then you can leave with the truth that a life was there and not scratched out.
I'm in the unknown...and truth be told despite my pangs of worry sometimes (of my age, my status, my toys; things so very trivial it bears no mind), I am truly a teenager happy to have it.
Too idealistic for you, reader? Perhaps. However, I've learned so much in the course of 10 years that I'm just now having the reigns on who I am, what I want and where I'm going...in the way that far exceeds my outlines, Blackberry schedule, 50 year life plan. It's something internal that has to do with accepting yourself, letting go of internal shame and giving up rules that were never your own. And once you have those philosophies within, then enjoying the unknown becomes even more joyous.
Walk in the pitch dark and find your way to the door. Blind yourself in the woods to hear all the sweet noises. Paint a canvas with all your desired colors and then fall into it.
Can I tell you a secret? There is nothing ever unknown because you have everything to know by using your strength, intellect, experience and an unlimited love for yourself through the highs and lows. This is your reserve, and everyone has it. So all in all, I am certain the unknown will bring you happiness if you just give yourself some faith and no judgment.
As for now, I plan to explore the unknown in my dreams...goodnight. :)
xo,
Jo
posted by Only The Lonely @ 1:30 AM
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